DELMARVA - They say it's the most wonderful time of the year, but for some, the holiday season is one of their saddest and loneliest times.Â
For people grieving a loved one, the holidays are a painful reminder. Jessie Dunleavy lost her son to an overdose in 2017, and it hurts the same every Christmas since.
"Your surroundings are sending you messages of joy and happiness and thankfulness," Dunleavy said. "I do believe you have to try to embrace some of that, you know, you can't just wallow in your grief, but it's a reminder that your life isn't just right."
For some, being surrounded by people can feel lonely as they try not to be a burden to others.Â
"Your heart is aching and you keep that to yourself in so many situations. And I think that makes grief worse," Dunleavy said.
Delaware Psychological Services psychologist, Dr. Katie Elder, advises turning that grief into celebration.
"You can feel their presence there by maintaining a tradition, or thinking of them fondly, or sharing a story about a time they were with you on the holidays," Dr. Elder said.
The holidays can also be less than joyful for those living with mental illness or struggling with the pressure and anxiety that comes with the season from things like spending a lot of money or a packed social calendar.Â
"They'll put things out to reference having a hard time, or they might have a subtle complaint. And I think it's OK to hear them," Dr. Elder said.
We should also be sensitive to people in recovery from substance abuse at a time when they're more vulnerable, surrounded by partying and alcohol.
"Have conversations. Are you uncomfortable if we have alcohol at our holiday party, and to support you would it be best if we didn't?", Dr. Elder said. "And can the family make a sacrifice to support someone who's struggling?"
To help make the holidays better for someone who's struggling? For Dunleavy the answer is simply kindness.
"The message is peace on earth goodwill toward man, and that's what I hold in my heart. And so, you try just to give people a break and not be so quick to judge," she said.
There's plenty of help out there if you or a loved one is feeling hopeless during the holidays or any time of year. Several national and local resources are linked below.Â
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National Resources
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline - 1-800-273-8255
Crisis Text Line - Text "HOME' to 741741
Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) National Helpline - 1-800-662-4357
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Delaware Resources
Delaware Psychological Services
Mental Health Association in Delaware - Kent/Sussex Counties: Call 1-800-345-6785 or Text "DE" to 741741
National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) Delaware
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Maryland Resources
Maryland 211 Helpline: Dial 211 and press 1Â
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